The Ammonford Crew

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"

I hate:

the woods

water

orcs

goblinoids of any kind

numskulls who don’t wear proper armor

elvish…stuff (jury’s still out on elves)

glowing squishy balls o’ light that seem to make fun o’ me height (on account they don’t come down low enough for me to hit ‘em)

Assassins ( Moradin’s Beard let a dwarf sleep!)

Vegetarians

Dragons

Wicksards…fi’s okay though

Any wildlife that sees a dwarf as food

did i mention orcs?

Comments

I would like to know: What is wrong with the woods? You never mind the food I bring you (that all comes from the woods). Water? You drink water, and beer is made from water. you would be sad if you didn’t have water . . . and it is necessary to bathe too. No argument with the orc’s, but I know this half-orc who has some usefulness to him. Goblinoids are same with the orc’s, but I don’t know any that have any usefulness at all, so let’s kill them. What is proper armor anyway? My AC is just as good as yours. Elvish stuff? B, you need to see my new boots and cloak. They are great. Glowing Squishy Balls o’ Light . . . I agree with you here. Assassin’s . . . up to my ears in them right now, so I will not respond to this one until I have a little backup to help me out. Vegetarians: People who don’t eat meat should not be trusted Dragons: what about them? the meat is good and they aren’t that hard to kill from what I have seen. Wizards have their place. They can be useful. And who doesn’t love Fi? I am not a fan of wildlife that tries to eat me either. And yes, you mentioned orcs.

Zar

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

Come on Braddoc, Learn to have fun with life. There is so much hate in this world, we need you to love. It would make everything in life better if you could just learn to love a little.

Zar

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

I love me axe…how’s that?

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

Good Start, now more . . . love more than the axe. Embrace the woods, the woods are your friend.

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

The woods tried to eat me…more than once.

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

That wasn’t the woods, that was creatures in the woods . . . and we killed them. So you must think of it from the perspective of the good side too. The woods has provided you with countless number of meals that you ate. And you have eaten far more times than the creatures of the woods have ever tried to eat you.

So again, love the woods.

Zar

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

I may not “hate” the forest…but i hate the stuff in it. Whew, that wasn’t easy…i need a drink.

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

You don’t hate the forest, I will buy you a drink as soon as you get back to Caenmore (when you coming home?)

Zar

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

Braddoc,

Aren’t sending stones great?

Zar

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

Sure, (although he’d never use one) it’s like dark-age e-mail.

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

I am sure that Zar and Fi would trick him into holding it while Zar sent a message just to freak hiim out. D

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

Once Braddoc gets the first message he drops the stone like it’s radioactive and backs away, quickly, and goes into his defensive stance. “Oi! That blooming thing just talked ta me!”

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

Zar is rolling on the ground laughing right now.

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

Laugh it up ye half-elf. Now go clean yer room!

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

2 things . . . 1: I’M NOT A HALF ELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2: Does he pick up the stone to tell Zar that? Cause without the stone, he didn’t hear Zar laughing.

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

No he doesn’t pick up the stone…ever…again. But i imagine Zar would know exactly what Braddoc would say. Braddoc’s nothing if not predictable.

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

Addendum;

Braddoc hates invisible shopkeepers

Giants of any kind, especially ones who bowl fer dwarves!

Thieves!!!!!

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

Although I cannot speak about invisible shop keepers since I have never seen one (pun intended) and I have never been the 10 pin in the game of bowling for dwarves (so I cannot comment on that one either, I can say that you have no idea what living with thieves is like. Seriously, you have to guard yourself at all times and guard your stuff when you aren’t there . . . not much fun.

Zar

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

BLASTED THIEVES!!!!!!!

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

They can be tricky, need to be cautious. Z

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
 

DEFENSIVE STANCE

Braddoc's List of "I Hate"
Drizzt

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